Through Darkness find Light

Twenty-six years ago, as a seven year old girl a miracle happened in my life. I was sad, my older brother was missing and I was afraid.

On September 22, 1989 my brother Josh Dennis went with my dad and his friends on a Scout Camp. He was only 10 years old, but he was 10 feet tall with hope and excitement. That night the group camped in Tooele, Utah near the abandoned Hidden Treasure Mine. They will all excited to explore it. After entering the mine the men and boys realized how truly dark it was. A group decided to leave the mine and my dad was among them. He told Josh to follow, but Josh begged to stay with the other group. My dad agreed. Joshua ran ahead to catch up with the group. The more he ran the farther away they got. Suddenly their lights disappeared.  Josh did not have a flashlight and was alone in the dark.

We didn't find out until the next day that he was missing. I was scared and didn't know what to do. I had to stay with friends that night while my mom went up to the mine to be with my dad. The next day we were taken to my grandparents house to stay. Each day that went by I was becoming more upset and worried. My grandma tried to keep us three kids busy and kept the TV off so we didn't hear the news reports. My grandma always would remind me later how I wouldn't let myself smile and have fun until Josh was back.

I remember one day, September 27th, that we thought it was a great idea to make Josh cards to give him when he was found. I was smiling. I was excited to give them to him. Sitting at my grandma's counter we were coloring and the doorbell rang. When it wasn't answered immediately they started knocking. My grandma answered the door and I couldn't understand what words were spoken, but within seconds there were screams of joy.

Joshua was found and he was alive. I started crying and I was so excited that we could give him our cards that we made.

This experience could have destroyed a family. We could have asked, "why us?" and left the church. But we know that we are here for a reason. We are here to endure and we can make it through anything, if we turn to the Lord and Choose The Right. I love how at last night's women's conference Linda Reeves 2nd Counselor in the R.S. said "We will be exceedingly blessed if we have faith and patience."

I feel that through this experience that my family went through I always remembered the blessings we received. My personal testimony grew and continues to grow when I remember that we are important to Him. After 5 days, and nights in a mine Joshua survived. He was there with my brother, He protected Josh and He was with our family.

When Josh was on his mission Sister Virginia U. Jensen spoke about my brother's experience in Conference. It was wonderful to be there with my fiancé Ryan. Sister Jensen spoke of the song Lead, Kindly, Light. (To read her full talk go HERE.)

Lead, kindly Light, amid th’encircling gloom; …

The night is dark, and I am far from home; …

Keep thou my feet; …

one step enough for me.

We will feel darkness at different times in our lives. When Josh was found the searchers put a hard hat on his head, they had a flashlight and they warmed him up. We too can feel protection from our Heavenly Father, we will see his light and feel warmth from His love.

J.K. Rowling

The well-known author has been on my mind lately. Last week it was her birthday who she shares with her famous character Harry Potter. After seeing a recent episode of Who Do You Think You Are? I learned that she also shares that day with her Great Grandfather.

J.K. Rowling (Jo) started a phenomenon for readers and writers alike. She brought imagination and fantasy and she modernized it and brought it to life for millions. I didn’t read her books until about 10 years ago. But she has inspired many other writers and it just set off and opened the door to imagination.

“There’s always room for a story that can transport people to another place.” ~J.K. Rowling

I watched the WDYTYA episode and as I watched her go back through time learning about her ancestors I realized how as they made decisions and accomplished goals that affected their family down the line, she did the same. We can learn more than wizardry from JK Rowling. She has taught us about hope, and determination and never giving up.

When she was a single mother she would write in a little café and rocked her baby’s stroller as she wrote. No matter what our circumstances, how much money we have and where we live, we all have our imagination. We can all dig deep and find what we love and do it.

From her journey on WDYTYA She learned about a lot about her family. Love, heartbreak and rising from a fall. About her 2^nd Great Grandmother “I feel we are what we are because of her bravery.”

   
 
 

Our lives are all important and worth something. I’m sure she never imagined that a little story about an orphan wizard would start a wild fire of stories. We all have something to give and we can all be important and remembered to someone. That is what I love about Genealogy. There are so many stories out there.  J.K. Rowling once said “No story lives unless someone wants to listen.” I am listening and that is why I am trying to find my families stories. I can learn so much from my ancestors.

 

Wonder

 

A few books have been said to change people’s lives. There are always classics on the list, The Great Gatsby, To Kill a Mockingbird, The Giver, Pride and Prejudice, The Diary of a Young Girl are just a few. Harry Potter became a sensation to readers and writers alike, changing the audience of many books. A few of my other favorites on the list are The Help, The Book Thief, The Fault in our Stars, The Hiding Place and Unbroken. One book in 2013 has joined the list, Wonder by R.J. Palacio.

It’s a story of a young 12 year old boy named August who is different. August was born with physical disabilities which lead to him being home schooled. August’s parents decide that after seven years of staying home it was time for him to go to school. They enroll him in the 7^th grade and the book takes us on a journey of his first year at school.

 

 

There are so many books that have negativity; it’s nice to read something inspiring. Wonder is a book that teaches love, friendship, forgiveness, humility and wants to make you become a better person.

Wonder is an eye opening book for people of all ages, young and old. It teaches us all a lesson to not judge a book (person) by its cover, because some books may just surprise you and have a story full of love and takes you on a journey of true friendship and self-discovery. 

 

Think of your favorite books, how they have changed you and how you can include the things you learned into your life.

 

R.J. Palacio has now written other short stories with the characters from the book Wonder.

 

I've only read Pluto so far, but I would love to read them all. Shingaling is coming out in May.

 

Goals

 

A few years ago a Hummingbird made a nest in our tree. We named her Honey. We were so excited to realize two little eggs in her nest.

 

 

I think a lot about goals. I have for a really long time. I have always struggled with making it that last step. I work really hard, but I get scared. I don't want to cross the finish line, just in case it's not good enough. I've spent many years working on a story about my grandparents. I want it to be so good, perfect. I realize that it won't ever be perfect. It could always be a little better, but I have to finish. I have to take that last step.

We loved seeing the babies Pebbles and Bam Bam.  

No matter what it is in life that we want to accomplish, we have to work hard, believe in ourselves, and do it. I really need to trust myself. I love this quote, "A bird sitting on a tree is never afraid of the branch breaking, because her trust is not on the branch, but on it's own wings. Always believe in yourself." ~Unknown

Pebbles and Bam Bam got bigger and learned to fly. They left after a few months and we haven't seen them since.

I've used the excuse that no one believes in me or really supports me, but that doesn't matter. I need to believe in myself in all that I do and prove to others that I can do anything.

I found this cute book called Someday. It's about  goals, and how it takes little steps to achieve them. We don't always get them right away and we need to be happy in the mean time. "Someday I'll be a famous artist and make millions from my paintings, but today I'll paint the garage."

We had a family home evening lesson on Goals last week. We talked about individual goals

And then we talked about family goals we could have together.
We hung the banner up in our kitchen to see it daily.

Power of Journals

Record keeping has been around since the beginning of time. The word journal comes from the French word Jour, which means daily book or log book. People keep records for many reasons.  Without journals we wouldn’t have so much information about the past, from important historical figures like George Washington to wars that our ancestors fought.

Thousands found strength from a simple diary of a girl during tumultuous times. Anne Frank captured our hearts as she wrote during World War II. She wrote her feelings about her new journal on June 20, 1942 shortly after receiving it for her birthday. Little did she know her words changed the world.  “Writing in a diary is a really strange experience for someone like me. Not only because I’ve never written anything before, but also because it seems to me that later on neither I nor anyone else will be interested in the musings of a thirteen-year-old school girl. Oh well, it doesn’t matter. I feel like writing, and I have an even greater need to get all kinds of things off my chest.” She later added, “Paper has more patience than people.”

I’ve found strength in the words and trials as I’ve read journals from my ancestors. One in particular my Great Grandmother Viola Stout. When she got older she had her journal made into books for her family. I've read it several times and learned so much from her writings. I never knew that as a young girl she wanted to be a writer and she had a teacher who believed in her so much that she would tutor her after school every day. Viola had many trials, after losing two daughters within months of each other she wrote, "Times like these bring a realization of our Elder Brother's suffering, far beyond our abilities to endure and live. This makes us aware our suffering is much less, can be endured. This was a year my doubts and beliefs fought the battle of faith and despair... Thanks to that special Gift the Lord gave us, Faith won, I became comforted. I reached the depths in 1929. By 1930, a new light led the way." With her words of endurance and faith I have learned that I can make it through hard times. Because she kept a journal we can learn from her experiences for many generations to come.

Spencer W. Kimball said, “Those who keep a personal journal are more likely to keep the Lord in remembrance in their daily lives.”

What is beauty...

You don’t have to try so hard

You don’t have to give it all away

You just have to get up, get up, get up, get up

You don’t have to change a single thing

Take your make up off

Let your hair down

Take a breath

Look into the mirror at yourself

Don’t you like it?

Cause I like you

The lyrics in Colbie Callait’s song Try, truly has deep meaning for a lot of people. What do you do for beauty? Do you have to Try? Like most, for me it’s been a roller coaster. The media tells you to look a certain way. You have to have your hair a certain way, wear makeup all the time, and wear brand name clothing. Does it really make a difference? Do you feel better, or does it add extra pressure to you?

Although, I’ve struggled with self-esteem throughout my life, as an adult I have a better understanding of what beautiful is. I have learned that I don’t need to “try so hard” to impress others with my outward appearance. It was all within me. If I believed it, others would also.

My Grandma Budd really influenced me and my self-image. Since I can remember, she always said wonderful things to me. I was sweet, kind, and beautiful, and to never change. As I got older and became a mom she told me that I was the best mom she had ever seen. I knew it wasn’t true, but I also knew that she wasn’t lying either. In her eyes she saw beauty, she was genuine. In the last month of her life, she didn’t know my name, but she knew how she felt about me, and told me how kind and beautiful I was, I was a wonderful mother and to never change.

As women, and human beings we owe it to ourselves and to others to see the good and beauty in others. Don’t judge, but love. Remember what Audrey Hepburn said, “For beautiful eyes look for the good in others; for beautiful lips, speak words of kindness; and for poise, walk with the knowledge that you are never alone.”

      Dove Beauty products has had a number of ads trying to show that beauty comes from with in. I saw this video and I just loved it so much. Click HERE to watch.

A Tree Grows in Brooklyn

A few years ago I read the book A Tree Grows in Brooklyn by Betty Smith for the first time. I have heard a few people say they didn't like it. They say it was boring, or slow. But to me this book was inspiring, sad, and so honest. Betty Smith is a poet. This book was a memoir of her life, but her publisher said no one would want to read a true story like that, so she called it fiction. What a tragic life, yet so beautiful the way she lived it.

 

My dad gave me this First Edition book. I was so excited. He gave it to me because my daughter's name is Brooklynn and he thought it would be fun, but he didn't realize how much I truly love the story of Francie Nolan.

 

It is funny how something can be so ordinary to someone, but to another it is a treasure. I try to look at life with that outlook to make things extraordinary. 

 

There are a lot of parts of the book I love but here is one of my favorite quotes.

 

She thought: If I open this book fifty years from now, I will be again as I am now and there will be no being old for me. There's a long long time yet before fifty years. . . millions of hours of time. But one hour has already gone since I sat here . . . one hour less to live . . . one hour gone away from all the hours of my life.

 

"Dear God," she prayed, "let me be something every minute of every hour of my life. Let me be gay; let me be sad. Let me be cold; let me be warm. Let me be hungry . . . have to much to eat. Let me be ragged or well dressed. Let me me sincere -- deceitful. Let me be truthful; let me be a liar. Let me be honorable and let me sin. Only let me be something every blessed minute. And when I sleep, let me dream all the time, so that not one little piece of living is ever lost."

 

I am not perfect. I have a lot to work on. My house isn't perfectly clean, I get upset at my kids, today I am sitting still in my pjs with no makeup on, we sometimes eat frozen pizza for dinner, but I try. I love my life, I love my kids and my husband and I try every day to be happy.

I want to live my life every minute that I can.

Let It Go

Disney movies all have a lesson that we can learn in the end. Cinderella helped us believe in true love. Aladdin  taught us that money doesn’t buy us happiness, but we provide it ourselves. Merida showed us that we hold fate inside ourselves; we have to be brave enough to find it. Beloved Dori helped us learn that when life is hard, just keep swimming.

            I love to use different experiences to teach my children. When we watch movies we talk about what we learned from it. As a family we watched Frozen and were coloring pictures. My kids asked me to draw pictures for them. As I was drawing I realized that the characters each learned a lesson and I could relate those lessons to my children.

            For my nine year old daughter Brooklynn who has suffered from anxiety, and is entering the years of self-doubt, I drew Elsa. On the back I wrote her a letter. “Brooklynn, Remember you are beautiful, talented and smart. When you get hurt, let it go. I love you.”

            Cameron is my six year old boy. He has a lot of energy and some people don’t understand him. I drew Olaf. “Cameron, I love you! I would do anything for you. Always be yourself.”

            For my little ball of fire four year old girl McKenna, I drew Anna. McKenna can be the most entertaining little thing, but she is shy and won’t let go of her mom at times. I wrote, “McKenna, Remember I always love you! Don’t be afraid, we will always be here for you.”

            So many talk about “hidden message” from movies, but I choose to find my own meaning. As a parent I choose what I want my kids to take away from their surroundings. I think that is our job. The world isn’t perfect, so I choose to find the positive. There seems to be a theme that I see in all Disney movies. Have faith in your dreams—they may come true!

            Next time you watch a movie with your family, think of what lessons you can learn from it, and use it to better your life.